Madness in Lumps - hereditary dumbness....<i wrote this junk a really long time ago....say five years> found it on my abandoned site just today.....it talks about ambition....surprisingly i must say iam as cloudy upstairs today...as i was then.
As i slouched through my days and my nights, i picked up things like lint. this last day of the old year is crisp and clear. the sun stabs the air and catches dust hovering in the room, lifted from nooks and crannies where my history accumulates. the urge to perform personal archeology is a strong one. it's a time to sort through the details and reflect on time well spent, if not spent well.
I spent april to october mostly in a fog induced by an unquantifiable drug, the chemical components of which cannot be mapped. many days i was walking around with my mind raw from the sun and barely said five words out loud. some things are difficult to look at directly; i can only peer at them obliquely from the corners of my eyes and hope that some day they will be easier to face.
It's impossible to bring closure to any event which appears as a landmark in our journey; they are connected to our today by thin lines, brilliant wires which both illuminate and blind. where i cannot learn from the past, i can resolve to only try to do better today than i did yesterday. that's my recurrent resolution, chanted like a morning prayer.
I could kick myself in the ass, and i sometimes do. Do you think there is any space for the real ambition to show.......WONDER WONDER.
amen
As i slouched through my days and my nights, i picked up things like lint. this last day of the old year is crisp and clear. the sun stabs the air and catches dust hovering in the room, lifted from nooks and crannies where my history accumulates. the urge to perform personal archeology is a strong one. it's a time to sort through the details and reflect on time well spent, if not spent well.
I spent april to october mostly in a fog induced by an unquantifiable drug, the chemical components of which cannot be mapped. many days i was walking around with my mind raw from the sun and barely said five words out loud. some things are difficult to look at directly; i can only peer at them obliquely from the corners of my eyes and hope that some day they will be easier to face.
It's impossible to bring closure to any event which appears as a landmark in our journey; they are connected to our today by thin lines, brilliant wires which both illuminate and blind. where i cannot learn from the past, i can resolve to only try to do better today than i did yesterday. that's my recurrent resolution, chanted like a morning prayer.
I could kick myself in the ass, and i sometimes do. Do you think there is any space for the real ambition to show.......WONDER WONDER.
amen
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